5 Tips to Help Build Your Resilience

Life is full of ups and downs. It is a part of the human experience.

And when difficult times inevitably arise, we all want to be able to meet the challenge.

Research has shown that while some people seem to navigate stormy waters with ease, it is possible for all of us to ‘learn’ and cultivate a collection of skills to move through adversity. This is called resilience.

Long term, our ability to bounce back after a transition or hardship determines our approach to life. And by building our personal ‘power’ and resilience, it is possible to grow and change, and learn from the tests we face. We can emerge even stronger to move forward in a transformational way.

This will only happen if our ability to bounce back is not depleted, and we can nurture our resilience by shifting and making changes to elements of our lives that we can control. This does take time, practice and commitment, and it will always be worth it in order to thrive at life and strive for our goals.

Here are my beginner’s techniques you can try to help boost your resilience for the future:

1. BE ACTIVE, NOT PASSIVE

When something initially begins to trouble you, how do you respond? Maybe you bury your head in the sand and hope it goes away. Perhaps you just ignore the situation and pretend it isn’t happening. Rather than passively waiting for things to get better, take steps to improve the situation head-on. Define the issue, consider your options, and Make. A. Plan. If there is something constructive you can do, do it. Setting out how to resolve the situation prevents it from becoming a full-blown issue.

2. GIVE YOUR DAY MEANING

Do you work to accomplish something, however small, each day? Or do you feel unproductive and ineffective, coupled with low mood? No matter what is going on in your life, you still need food, rest, love, exercise, and fun. Consider each day an opportunity to do something positive. Don’t pressure yourself into having to accomplish big things, keep it simple and achievable. This might be something low-key such as going for a walk, finishing a novel, or calling a close friend for a catch up.  What you do with your life each day provides meaning for you and keeps motivation high.

3. LOOK BACK AND APPRECIATE PAST DIFFICULTIES

Do you try to forget about the previous challenges or trauma that have happened in your life? Instead, try applying what you learned from those struggles to navigate present or future situations. Reflecting on what you’ve been through may bring up the mistakes you made, but you can feel proud of how you handled some situations. Focusing your energies on the lessons and skills you have learned from past experiences builds your resilience. You will also have the fortitude and motivation to continue.

4. DEVELOP YOUR SUPPORT NETWORK

When times are tough, do you want to crawl into a hole and hide away? It is a fallacy that successful people take on the world by themselves; you will always be stronger and more capable when surrounded by people who care for you. Talking about a situation with a friend or loved one won't make your troubles go away, however it does allow you to share your feelings, get support, receive positive feedback, and come up with possible solutions to your problems. Stay connected with a  supportive system of people you can call and turn to whenever you face a challenging time.

5. TREAT YOURSELF WITH COMPASSION

Do you treat yourself as if you are the most important person in your life? Probably not. While we tend to treat our friends with love and kindness, we’re often tougher on ourselves. In fact, studies have shown that people who treat friends and family well actually score low on tests to measure self-compassion, and they are particularly hard on themselves over perceived failures. The solution is to think of yourself as a friend and apply the same empathy. Self-compassion also means allowing ourselves the kindness to tackle our setbacks, without judgment or self-criticism.